Northlands Adventure

Fiendking Slayers
Year 2 Day 31

“What does this mean?” His mother asked pulling the book away from Fisher, but it was a question to the two of them.

“Well,” Lash let Fisher do the answering, if he had it. It was always best to pretend to be slower, and how Fisher answered. His brother scratch thoughtfully at his hairless chin, he didn’t have a clue. “I’d say this low born idiot just made up this rubbish up.”

“Lash,” She ground her teeth together but kept a loving smile on her face, for her darling Fisher.

“I think maybe Fisher is right. But,” He feigned as if the idea just came to him, as if it was a passing thought. “We all know The Battle for Elm Water by Ieve Eshe and Tammella “Star Sight” Keamen’s Elm Water Reflections differ by a great degree. From this reading and the one by Breck Coleman it seems that both songs hold the seeds of truth of what happened in Volkshield. Elm Water Reflections only just names of people and locations, almost nothing else.”

“And? Go on.” He looked to Fisher hoping his brother would get it, finish his thought.

“_Peace that Lasts_ by The Great Queen herself doesn’t mention much of Shelvan Crusk.” Lash pointed to the tome on the large wood table, one of a dozen by the woman who conquered and then first ruled a united Midlands. Then to the book Fisher had just finished reading, that Lash had read minutes before. “But Shelvan Crusk’s recollections are more… are a more bloody and cruel tale. Not like any concept of what I heard happened at the Shield Wall.”

“It’s boiled down to this boys. History is written by the victors.” That smile never faltered, but it shown brighter as she stroked her hand across Fisher’s cheek. Then dropping before she reached Lash, picking up the book instead, coming around front. “But it’s made memorable by the Bards.”


“Hail,” Hals Meebler shambled up to the dozen of so Reachers who stood together, all talking. “Hail, friends. Have any of you seen Meeshla Brel? Meeshla Brel the baker’s daughter?”

Unfortunately none of them did, looking at each other searching for anybody who recognized the name. Hals nodded, looking off to the east as if he might see her there. He didn’t leave though, massaged his damn ruined leg the only thing that had kept him from completing his urgent task. A few of the good people shrugged, about ready to turn back to their conversations, when Hals went on.

“The devils are gone, thought we’d be under their nails forever but they’re gone!” Everyone nodded to this fact, it was evident.

“You… know something bud?” A balding man asked.

“I know I’m going to find Meeshla Brel and I’m going to marry her. Those Elk Lodgers just killed that evil bastard Mordie and… I don’t know, banished the devils, or something.” Now he had everyone’s attention, but he was talking distractedly, looking off at another group. For his soon to be wife. “I gotta go find Meeshla and…”

“Now just wait a second,” Baldy reached out, grabbing hold of Hals, then apologetically steadying him when Hals’ leg almost gave. “You’re in no shape to go running around just yet. So catch your breath. Tell us what happened.”

“I said it.” Now he did seem more out of breath than he’d been before, leaning on Baldy.

“How do you know?” A woman demanded clutching a tiny child to her chest in a practiced way that said she’d been doing so since the Devils came to town.

“I know dear lady because I was THERE.” He brushed that away though since that wasn’t important at all. “I was there and thought for sure my days were done. The whole while all I could think of was that smile. On doing something I should have done months ago. My Meelsha.”

“You were there!” More than half of them hadn’t heard anything he’d said after the initial announcement, they were so busy talking over each other.

“Start at the beginning man. Tell us what happened.” Another man, judging by his apron and the towel he was holding he was a Innkeep. He offered out a flash from one of the apron pockets and Hals waved it away, but the child clutching woman took. “Well calm yourself. Tell us what happened. Nobody else knows nothing.”

“I live over on the west side of town, by the gates.” Hals had to pick his words and gather strength from each of them. All of them crowding in closer and closer. “I was risking my damn life, like we had to every time we went out with those… things all round. For some bread, and cheese this time. Half starving myself before I went out. Well, I look up and what do I see. Those bloody Elk Lodgers strolling right down the middle of the street, just as bold as you please.” Hals shook his head and ran his hands through his greasy hair, laughing raggedly. “I thought for sure ten dozen devils would descend on them, but it never happened. That Lash Bremlee, the bard you know of him right?” Nods all matching Hals’. Course they did. “I’ve done a few jobs for him and he sees me, and they all come over. Just as casual as a Sunday stroll.”

“What?” Asked one.

“Pelor’s bright light!” Whispered another, realized there was no longer devils around to hear, said it louder. “Pelor’s bright light! Really?”

“Yeah, I about ran away because I was still expecting those devils to rain in on them.” Now Hals’ laugh was a little bit manic, realizing just how crazy it had been. He puffed up a little though, “Lash says they are needing good women and men to come along with them, that they are gonna free the city. Don’t know why he’d think I was one, but what was I to say? No? I’d rather just risk my life going for lunch? So I nodded and went with them. Soon enough there was a big group of us and we are all strolling, me a lot less boldy then the rest. That bastard Mordie is taunting them, you know. Taking up the Elklodge as his manor. Cause that’s where we headed. All those devils just watching us. They must a made a deal with them devils, The Heroes of the Elk, for them to stand aside. Gave their souls up for us, maybe. Promised to burn in the depths of hell for a thousand years, for a chance at Mordie. I don’t know. But those devils stepped aside.”

“Dear gods!” They were all shaking their heads.

“Good folk those heroes of ours. Those Elklodgers.” Hals nodded at the imagined sacrifice they must have made to secure whatever pact they had to get the devils to stand down. “That mage of theirs, Rundel Code. He shouts a spell and the doors fly open, guess that Mordie had it magically locked. They all run in, I hobble behind as best as I can. Feeling like a man ten dozen times better than I am. When I get in the other recruits are forcing their way up the stairs, where Mordie had the Emerald Falcons locked away. I was dumb struck. Mordie sitting up on his throne, right on the stage of the Elk, where I seen Lash Bremlee perform hundred times or more. He’s staring hell fire at them, and what do they do?”

“Fight?” Asked baldy, all of them stuck to the tale, as stink on fermented fish paste.

“No, Lash and Borin walk over to the bar. They argue a minute over whose round it is to buy, turns out it was Emma’s. She plops a gold coin down, then they all got an ale. Looking surprised when Mordie growls something to one of his culty servants standing by. ‘Balguun hire some new dancers?’ Borin asks like he’s going to have a talk to the Innkeeper about his choices in entertainment. ‘Dancers? No, this here is a comedy troop. They tell jokes, throw pies at each other, and the one in the middle with horns and a tale shits himself as a grand finale.’” Hals does a feeble job of impersonating a female voice. “Emma the halfling says laughing like she’s seen them before. About that time I was looking for a place to hide, Mordie was glaring so hard.”

“Emma’s my favorite.” Milton told everyone worming his way to near the front of the gathering crowd. Somebody else shushed him.

“Well, that evil bastard can’t take anymore of this treatment. Not used to it since he got all those devils to push everyone around. ‘You fools can make jokes but the Silverwraiths got me The Devil Artifact. I control every devil in the depths of hell. I’m gonna use them to…’ Now it’s the Elklodger’s turn to look annoyed. Emma rolling her eyes at Mordie’s blatherings. He spluttered and all his loyal cultists start pulling out weapons. ‘It’s time for you to DIE!’ He waves his hands at them, I dive under a table at the back, thinking devil magic is gonna stream out. Nothing happens. I look up and Borin’s stroking his beard, Faelan’s looking out the window at a hummingbird, Rundel’s brushing some lint off his sleeve, and Lash starts to clap. None of them had even flinched, ‘Told you they was a comedy troop. He’s going to shit himself now.’ Emma says only then putting down her mug.”

Everyone laughed nervously not quite sure they were out of danger, Milton the loudest. “Told you she was my favorite.”

“‘Get them!’ He orders to his bodyguards but they can only get a nod off before Rundel spins his staff. Says some words and when he snaps it forward a he gives them a taste of what they are going to find on the otherside. Fire. Boom! I go back under the table and lots of spells get thrown around, go off like the worst thunderstorm ever. It goes quiet. I peek up and all the cultists are lying dead with Rundel and Faelan glowing with steam and moonlight. Mordie still standing there half looking like he might just do as Emma said he would. Mordie draws his sword and Borin aims his spear. Emma takes out that hammer of hers that I couldn’t lift two handed even before I was injured so badly. Lash draws his sword and says, ‘Get off my fucking stage!’” Hals looks to the woman with her child, then the others in the crowd, shrugging. “Sorry ma’am but that’s what he says. I’m just telling the tale like it happened.”

The woman waves away the idea of polite conversation. “I’m married to a docker sir, my husband starts and every sentence with that word.”

“Surely so.” Hals still looks sheepish and guilty about it. “Get off my fucking stage! Colder and angrier than I ever heard. Like somebody is with his lover and not just raised wood planks. ‘Get off my fucking stage!’ That fool Mordie don’t listen though and Lash runs and jumps on it. He’s wearing full armor, daggers, shield, that new singing sword of his, AND his lute. He jumps up onto his stage and I can’t even keep track of all that happens. Mordie must have had some tricks still up his sleeve because he grows in size, brushing the rafters of the Elk. A giant stinging of brimstone! Borin and Emma are stabbing and smashing away. Faelan conjures up what seemed to be Corellon’s own sword. Rundel’s throwing lightning, fire, frost like he’s every season rolled into one. All the while Lash is front and center, trading blows with that devil powered overlord. One moment I see half of Lash’s arm hanging off, then Faelan gets Corellon to heal it up. Emma’s on top of the the beast’s shoulder, smashing his head. Borin is dodging under it’s massive feet, stabbing and spinning that longspear. Then, finally, that great horned ass goes down. Like a falling tree. Only ain’t no tree I ever seen bleed that much. Lash ‘The Harpy’s Widow’ ‘Otyugh Wrestler’ and ‘Fiendking Slayer’ Bremlee , like taking out the chamber pot picks up that great big body. Throws it off onto the barroom floor, and says. ‘A thousand years was worth the price to keep rubbish like this off my fucking stage.’ And then The Emerald Falcons are coming down from upstairs all battered and bruised. Everyone saying the devils have gone off on their own accord, who knows if they’ll be back. I left Lash sitting on that stage playing his Lute, knew I gotta find my Meelsha. Life’s too short to go another minute without her.”

“Go get her man!” Baldy cries like he hadn’t been the one to hold Hals back.

“Brel you say? I think I saw her and her dah o’er by the docks, buying the last of the flour. Gods above, we gotta tell somebody to open the port up again. Get trade going.” Then the crowd parted, Hals on his way to love and destiny.

Everyone had something to go and do. By the way they darted to the next crowd over it was to relay the tale. Hals disappeared taking a shortcut down an alley towards the docks. A dirty young man in plain clothes came out from there very shortcut a few moments later, smiling. He joined one crowd, then another, and another. Each time he corrected a detail that he’d heard right from somebody who’d been there. Or added something that had been forgotten. Laughed loudest at the funny parts. Told how his mom and dad were both taken by Mordie’s cultist and never came back. A few others said similar had happened to them. Lost a relative, a friend, Mordie had even taken some favorite family pets. The bastard! To do some fiendish deeds to, everyone was sure. On his slow way home he heard the tale spreading like wildfire.

Smiled wider and wider each time he heard, “Get off my fucking stage!”

“Sometimes mother,” He told the stairway as he made his way up to his room at The Elk, which was getting busier and busier, for some reason. “The bard just has to make sure the dramatic stays in the tale.”

Cleaned up and properly attired in his feathered cloak, he thought. “Now it’s time to get ON my fucking stage.”

But really, all of the North was his fucking stage.

Bar Room Bliss (Roll20)

Daxos, Emma, and Lash get to know each other for a little bit. After a little bit of conversation Lash takes to the stage for an impromptu song named Internet Woes that lasts like an hour and a half. So taken with the song the shirtless Daxos goes to his room to contemplate life. Lash finishes the song and comes down to join Emma and a new visitor, Rex Dimeadozen mumbling about a secret.

Before he can get it out Nina Waveharp gets accosted by a drunk and overly affectionate ruffian. Things quickly escalate into Emma’s favorite past time as she rushes in to help the well proportioned waitress. Rex gets punched, Lash gets slammed around, and jolly chaos ensues. All six members of the gang known as The Herd find themselves early to bed and worst bruised. Then their leader and boss lady tromps in a little late to the party but with enough muscles to equal her entire gang. Bovina throws some insults around, not good ones, then the fight begins again. POW! WHAMMY! KERFUFFLE! Emma knocks the She-Orc right out the doors. Lash and Rex get a drink. Then Lash takes to the stage already putting together his next song about brave Emma and Rex vs Cowzilla. Emma giddy after earning the everlasting affections of Nina.

It Feels Naughty In Your Mouth
Day 316

Cleric Siannodel turned outdoors woman is training with her new friend Eir Sigsdottir are out ranging, talking, and learning when they come near a little communal village of sorts. It’s Pannilla and they make the second or third most famous Fermented Fish Paste, a regional favorite*. Before she could get introduced to any of the regulars, who know a good deal about local herbs and fish, bad stuff happens. A ghost ship is slowly, and I mean slowly, creeping across the water in the direction of Winter’s Reach. A drunk fisherman by the name of Sigrid goes out there and after a scream sits down and comes back.

Eir and Faelan decide it’s best to go back to Winter’s Reach and get the heroes formerly never really known as The Elklodge Auxiliary. There she gets the aid of Borin, Emma, Rundel, and some unknown mystery being. Following their nose to Pannilla they see The Rusty Tamborine (The Ghost Ship) is now stationary and the town is quiet. A knock on the Long House door shows that some of the villagers listened to Faelan’s warning and sought shelter from whatever shit was going to go down. Other’s didn’t.

After fighting and exploring a few of the towns the group learned that creatures were jumping into people’s mouth’s and taking them over. With some magic the creatures evacuated the hosts without doing them harm. Without magic it ruins them. She saves one of the sailors from The Rusty Tamborine and Gricca tells them a few details of his horrible experience. After the first episode the screen goes black as the heroes decided whether to take a break or not. Not noticing the water teaming with black slithering monsters or a forest of animals slowly converging on Pannilla.

*Pannilla’s Tinned Paste is a regional favorite like all Fermented Fish Paste is a regional delicacy. It’s only such to the certain percent of the population who enjoy such things.

The Infamous Pilgrim Mine

The PCs return to the Undertombs of Pilgrim Mine to try their luck at the next tomb. This tomb contained several levers that were needed to be activated to advance, but every time a lever was pulled a new challenge was place before the heroes. The first lever animated the stone statues in the tomb. The second, in a chamber full of bones, caused the bones to come together to make the skeletal torso of giant. The third and final lever opened a hidden door in the ceiling, which dropped a Gelatinous Cube upon whoever has close to the lever.

Upon reaching the final chamber of the tomb, the heroes were greeted by the Ghost of Mage Darheim and presented with an option to take a small chest filled gold or risk it all for the loot in the cavern below the tomb.

After much debate, the PCs head down into cavern below where they encounter a horde of Skeleton Giants. Before the skeletons attack, Darheim appears and tells the PCs if the wish to leave alive they must each add 200 gold pieces to the treasure horde and give up two of the groups magical items. The heroes refuse and an epic battle takes place. The PCs, already wounded and drained of spells from the tomb, are no match for the Darheim’s skeleton giants. At the edge of defeat, the PCs surrender and take Darheim’s offer. Lash’s magical sword Wolfsbane, Faelan’s Pearl of Power, and the gold are added to the loot pile and the PCs are allowed to leave with their lives.

Entrance to the tomb seals after the PCs leave and the return the Elk defeated. It is a sad in the North.

Secret Training Ranch
Day 254 - Day 315

This is the story of a dwarf and his ram. Of how they became best friends.

Unfortunately it’s all a sworn secret.

So it’s a story that will never be known.

What we do know, what I have put together after exhaustive research over many years. Spending piles of coins on informants and augury. We all know the story of how Borin aka The Hillander Sentinel, the Pike Master General, and The Beard of Loinlather found Hannibal. Rescuing the citizens of Twelve Pebbles and the race of Giant Sheep themselves. This is all well documented by the songs of Lash Bremlee; Ramming Steed and Droves of Wargs and Goblins. In those hundred percent accurate tales Lash speaks from his perspective of the battles. Of how waves of goblins threw themselves at the heroes and were continuously thrown back, the citizens of the tent city saved. By Borin with the aid of his sidekicks; Walhand, Emma, Faelan, and Khan.

“There came a bleating to our ears. The heroes clothed in sweat, me in tears.
Borin strode forth toward the sound, when quiet lay the entire canvas town.
Over blood soaked stinking warg fur, warted flesh of goblins who did not stir.
There crawled a battered foe, but another hero was not letting it go.
Borin grinned his approval vast, for the kid who killed the enemy at last.”

That excerpt from Droves of Wargs and Goblins was the account of how Hannibal was found. Killing a goblin who was trying to escape from the Heroes. The real story comes months later when it is purported, even though he and his many Assistant Professors deny it, that Tark Lofgren trained both Dwarf and Beast. During those months at a place called either The Farm or The Branch, Hannibal and Borin spent nearly every waking moment together. Maybe there was druids or witches that magically bonded the two, linking them in some way. I cannot speak for much now, but I promise to continue my research, to get to the bottom of this barrel of mystery.

Journalist Hilda Omdahl

Day 270

After a couple weeks of down time, the group finally gets some work from Hav. Emma, Faelan, Khan, and Rundel accept the job and are sent to an abandoned section of the city’s sewer to deal with the Zookeeper’s latest tentacled beastie, preferably non lethally this time.

The currently half-frozen sewers of Winters Reach prove to be a bid of a challenge for the adventurers. Every member of the group eventually found themselves swimming in the frigid and murky sewer water at some point while trying to cross gaps in the tunnels. The adventurers encountered a pair of Gray Oozes and some Rat Nests while searching for Hav’s “tentacle beast”. The group eventually finds their target, and are unable to subdue the beast. The monster flees and the PCs return to Hav’s warehouse to regroup.

During the rest, Lash and Walhand are summoned to help with Hav’s task. The group return to the tentacle beast’s lair and fish the beast out of the water with a turkey filled waterskins full of strong whiskey. Once the booze kicked in the heroes were able to wrestle the beast into submission, completing Hav’s task.

Mail is waiting for the heroes when they return to The Elk. The first is a letter from Captain Hrogan expressing his concerns about an impending giant invasion. The second is from the Mage Tower requesting Rundel’s presence.

The group follows Rundel to the Mage Tower. As the heroes make their way through the city towards the Mage Tower the city’s warning bells and horns fill the air alerting the citizens of a nearby fire. The group heads towards the fire, which Faelen discovers that it’s at the Mage Tower from a responding guard. Faelen also finds out that the Mages were various monsters to melt the snow in the courtyard, when an apprentice lost control. The heroes battle a trio of Hell Hounds and 2 F ire Elementals in the courtyard and afterwards they meet Sapphen the Blue.

The Sunken Tower - Dav loves Rudy
Day 244

Lady Avery Marcherone seeks the party out since they never bothered to contact her, even though they promised they would for the next adventure they went on. Nobody ever did. So she was kinda angry. Even more so when hardly nobody was there at the Elklodge. Well not nobody, there was Faelan, Khan, and the new guy Rundel. Lash was there to but nobody rolled high enough on their perception checks to notice him sneaking out behind the sailors. Probably because they were hot sailors and the person offering the mission was a noble, Hashtag Noblehater!!!.

So she blindfolds them, even though they’d rather not be, taking them on a forty minute ride. Mostly in circles. Then to a gated park like area, snow covered, where there is an obelisk. The Lady made sure that the trio of heroes were looking not, then swiped her password in it. The Elves keen ears caught that it was at least an eight digit password; with at least one cap, a number, and a special character. That done, with confirmation email and text message, a secret door opened down into a cavern.

Khan spidered down the rope provided by the incomparable Davtumal, but must have greased it. Two splats later a cleric and mage get to the floor. After a search of the well burgled room the trio come away with a grody dairy and a magically locked door. Thank Corellon that Faelan was there with her high elf birthright, using Arcane magics to unlock the door. Inside was what the elves decided to call a “Lift” and the humans (half of Rundel too) named an Elevator. Down but the elevator only went down a two floors, the third was all jammed up, Avery saying she’d get some idiots to unclog it.

The second floor was Kermit’s offspring if he never met that sexy bacon smelling pig. Evil, slimy, fanged frogs. A swamp that once was a… couple of floors of major sized tower. Exploring the room the group found some chandeliers in water, that Khan claimed. There was other loots too. In the middle was a pretty intact room, like an office, or tactics room. On the table was a couple of maps, one of theoretically where the Sunken Tower stood, the other of the Southlands. On it was several jades, almost as much Citrine, one garnet.

During the whole trip the group collected some of the frog eggs, which they sold to Hav. The gemstones. Some of the magic chandeliers. A few knickknacks. But the most valuable treasure they gained was the love an elderly servant for the childlike beauty of the half-elf Rundel.

Poor Noble House Tan
Day 242

I guess he wasn’t bad after all.

Something, and tigers, and goblins! Timmy!
Day 230

The group was resting comfortably in the Elk Lodge when a red headed woman walked up to them and asked for help. A wagon driver by trade she needs to get her goods to Tiny Brook however something had been attacking those on the road as well as the incredibly large sheep from that area. Borin, Faelan, Khan, Lash, and Walhand agree to go.

Hired for the trip the group leaves in the morning with time not on their side as the wintry weather sets in. While the first few miles are uneventful and calm the threat of snow is made good as heavy dark clouds let loose and a blizzard begins. The two wagons with their oxen slowed down as muddy wheel ruts filled in with more and more snow. Something large, stalked the group, moving beyond the edge of the trees along side the road.

Trees that hung over the road had collapsed into it at one point making the group pause before the creature charged on his many legs. Hissing it’s head went forth upon a long thick neck the end barely showing to be a head besides the large black eyes of the beast, his flat nose and an all too wide grin of razor sharp teeth. Thick white fur covered his body as he bound out from the deep snow only to plunge back in once more.

The creature was quickly brought down however. Pressing on through the snow and getting deeper into night they forged ahead to the small but growing village of Tiny Brook. Deciding not to rest they talk with Garland Bush the leader of Tiny Brook, who paid them for their efforts before he handed them off to the young helper and shepherd Timmy.

Finding out that the village is threatened not only by goblins and their wargs but also by other creatures that are attracted to blood they stop in at the local dining area which is in the dryer’s, an area where they dry out lumber for burning or simply to use in structures. Using a number of fire pits the enclosure is kept nice and warm against the icy cold just outside. There they picked up a bucket of sheep’s blood which was used in making blood sausage.

Silently they walked through the darkness as a blinding snow storm blew around them adding inch after inch of snow to what had already been feet. Trudging along what was barely a path they entered an area that made Timmy concerned for them. Giving them a warning, Timmy vanished into the snow with his dog before a pair of white sabertooth tigers started to stalk the group, lured in by the smell of blood.

The tigers almost killed at least one of the party before they too met their end.
With some half dead, the group trudged onwards with the snow about as tall as the rogue halfling and the warrior dwarf. Almost to the canyon of the sheep the wargs showed up melting out of the darkness and storm with their goblin riders. A howl went up before the goblin patrol rushed forwards, but mere goblins and their allies were no match for even the injured group though some escaped.

Trying to track the escaping goblins to perhaps find their camp the group moved on before the cold and their own injures became to much. They made camp and got warm and rested as the heavy snow continued before Timmy showed up with his dog and a bundle of provisions for breakfast. Tracks gone the group turned back for Tiny Brook with Timmy showing them the path.

Although faint on the praise, once more Garland brought out a small chest and tossed the adventurer’s some hard earned coin and Miss Eaton, the wagon driver offered to take them back to Winter’s Reach.

Clan of the Cave Bearowl
Day 220

Human brigands upon Bearowls have been attacking the merchants wagons traveling the Long Road between Windermere and Miradanu (Home of the winter bees and their valuable honey). Marvik dispatches the group take care of the problem, warning that they took out some well trained merchant guards. When the group gets to Miradanu they meet the Noble in charge by the name of Iris Chandler, she gives the group the outline of what is happening and what is needed. The group travels with a merchant to Windmere but get nothing but a flyby. Then Borin has the idea to travel in a lightly guarded caravan. They recruit a brave genius, Master Wagoneer Polk and his expertly trained Oxen Sleeve and Ten. He leads them to not one but two confrontations with the Bearowl Brigands. Unfortunately the heroes had eager sword hands and iced one of the captured outlaws right in front of the the other brigand. That made it clear to the living outlaw that there would be no way out and he stopped being helpful. After wandering in the woods for several days the heroes left the outlaw tied to a tree, without an ear.


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